Birthday 'Bashes' & Feeding Frenzy...

Crazy things that I was doing last week:

Having a birthday 'bash'. My gawd... I missed this 'tradition', though not on the receiving end of it.
The 3 buggers who's born on the same day. All of them got beaten up on the same day too.

Presenting: Reccos and the First Wives' Club!

Was it worth giving up a free beer session for?
Hell Yeah!
Times like these, it's PRICELESS.

And on another day last week, we were doing this:

Our very first 'film'. Signs of low/no budget: Handphone light, handheld camera, and best of all, a talent for the cheap price of $2.50.

Meet our newly signed 'talent' Ernest*.
Isn't he cute?

Ernest on a ruler ala "Pirates of the Caribbean". Oh, and the spider in the background, his name's Silas.

Ernest showing that he has no respect for the master of the lair. Must've balls of steel.

For those who are interested, we stayed for an hour and a half in the hot stuffy carpark without seeing any actions.
we gave up and went to coffee in the end instead.

6 days later, Silas finally decided that enough was enough.
Ernest, you survived our expectations, you are a survivor indeed.

And I dunno why but I have to include this pic, cos the li'l boy is really quite cute...

Xw's cousin. Has cheeks that we all love to pinch.

*we name the damn mouse Ernest after our bastardly S3 from camp, but like Jamesy boi said, after all, he went through OCS, so his namesake also quite the fierce...

Narrow. Escape. Or maybe not...

My mum snooked/lao gan-ed* me just now.

After brushing teeth and everything, she was talking to me and exclaimed:"You've been smokin ah?!?!?!?! Can smell your breath from here!!!!"

I didn't even look up and nonchalently said NO.

Only to continue focusing on the damn phone and pretend she was asking something stupid and incredible.

My gawd.

I think she STRONGLY suspects now.
I NEED TO CUT DOWN...

:(

PS: Or maybe I shouldn't smoke like 2 hours before I go home???

*Lao-gan = Yz-ed**

**Yz-ed = to cheat, swindle, play mind games. ie: Nabei, you Yz-ed me just now, I thought you doing 13 Terminals(十三么)? How come can become a Pure Green Suit(绿一色)???

Stuffed Happyness

Last Fri, we had dinner at Kushinbo.

It was with a fantastic group of people who I had the pleasure of knowing for close to 2 years, some of them longer, one of them longest.

The dinner was nothing short of crazy.

We had people doing this:

(Kev attempting to feed Beng)
To people doing this:

(That's me for the uninitiated)

And what about after dinner activities?
There were:

1. The return of the 3 Stooges... I mean Ladies.

2. The Golden Monkey(Me) and The Silver Orang Utan(iban) stance.

3. And this one... erm, I dun really wanna know what's going on.

Topped off the night with some buttons mashing at the games console, bball throwing, photo hunting and some screaming at the table soccer area.

Shiok.

Thanks guys, for another memorable night out.
PS: Giang not in this group picture cos she's the one taking it, hahahaha!!!

Everythin happens for a Reason...

Phone.

Try as I might didn't manage to get the phone now I have a new one.

Jobs. Missed/cancelled job
Didn't get the job therefore able to have a good relaxing mj session/supper session without worrying about jobs.

Not going.

Not going better since the hawker centre was undergoing cleaning.

The deleted messages.

That tells me that moving on is the best thing I should do now.

Everything happens for a reason.
If you believe it.

Me?

I believe that after this post, I'll be so hungry and thirsty I'll go grab some noodles and beer.

Oh wait.

I've already got them.

See? :)

Wine, dine and 300 men...

Bibo, ergo sum. I drink, therefore I am

-- Fredirect Toyou

Had a mini drinking session on Tuesday with 2 guys and 1 lady, with the notable absence of another bugger.

I can't seem to remember the last time I was able to sit down and relax in the company of friends.

Work, work, work.

Managed to catch 300 last night.

Either you like it, or you don't.

I loved it.

Made me feel bloodthirsty,

and hungry for chicken nuggets, after staring at those abs for so long....

An inspiration for me to follow.

Will update on the washboard abs should they ever appear...

Supper with the Bravo guys and the addition of Mr Horny's bro(and bro's gf).

Ended up talking about the feeding habits of a certain 8 legged house pet owned by Jamesy boi himself.

Mice, crickets, toads.

We agree that he treats his pets with lots of TLC.

Next thing I knew, we were home...

Till the next time guys....

Let sleeping dogs lie...

It's hard to take over the world when you sleep 20 hours a day,

Darby Conley (Get Fuzzy 06/07/04)

How so very true.

Can't seem to get anything done today.

Quit in a middle of a Dota game cos I was falling asleep.

Concussed in the midst of reading comics.

Left the tv on while I snore on the bed.

I must have fallen asleep half a dozen times today while I was supposed to do something.

Chair, floor, sofa, bed.

Everywhere, anywhere.

I wonder if it's a open protest by my body for the abuse that I've been subjecting it to.

I need to use these few days to recover, then its back to work.

If there is work in the first place.

There might be a chance, just a chance that the month of May this year might be different...

Driving past past...

Driving past past…

Cruising down the expressway,
Over the bridge,
Cool wind.
Cool.
Cool.
Not cold.
Memories, they make me shiver,
Memories that involved you, and me.
Cruising.
Cruising past the place where I told you that I loved this part of Singapore, my favouritest view in the whole of the island.
Still is.
They build everything so fast now.
So, so fast.
The ferris wheel.
It’s almost up.
Looking to the left made me realize that you aren't there.
You left.
Empty space in the car.
The saddest thing is that the window seems so huge, so alien, without you.
More space to see the view.
The view that’s changing, like you, like me.

The song playing in a loop in the car that’s moving in a singular direction.
Straight.
You can drive past past,
But you can never outrun them.
Once you stop, they catch you.
Once you get back to the same place, they’re already there, waiting for you.
Either way, you’re f**ked.
Just keep moving on.
But how long can you move on,
How far?
How fast?

Cars, all blurry as I sped on by.
The view outside became a kaleidoscope of colours,
I see only a myriad of sights, too fast to digest, too slow to discard.
Sounds.
The sounds culminating in a symphony of rushing wind and purring engines,
But I think I can still hear your voice, your laughter.
Or was it mine?

Song still playing in a loop.

Search, spin, click.
Next song please.

Objects in the rear view mirror.
Were they there before, like they are, now?
I didn’t bother then.
I didn’t bother now.
I’m just sneaking glances to check if the past is catching up on me.
Cos it always do.
Every f**king single time.

Turn up the volume, pick up the pieces, and move on…
Favorite

Money, money, money....

Money, money, money.

I love to have them.

But I hate to count them.

Especially when I'm counting them for the sake of clearing accounts.

Though ironically, the clearing of accounts will mean that I am clearing them to get my money back...

Back to the receipts then...

To do or not to do...

If life was like a train, then we won't have problems with crossroads.

Just follow the f**king tracks.

Let someone else decide for you

Maybe like Ed says, its too early to decide what to do or where to go,
but I'm a greedy, ambitious and impatient man.

So what others can do in years, I want in months.

Maybe I don't have the experience, the intelligence, the know-hows blah blah.

But I still want it, I dream it, I desire it.

Though eventually the realization is another issue...


Sigh...
I am in need of a good rest.
And a good thinking session.

Pass me the thinking cap/hat/beanie please...

22 and counting...

Of non-sleep that is.

Discounting the short nap I managed to steal and my friend's humble abode(45 min leh, or maybe even less than that, cos I was woken up by first the Postman and then my Producer who conveniently forgot to tell me I needed to send something, somewhere, thus screwing up my somehow, somewhat, SleepSongSong plan...)


22 freaking hours and still up and running.

Correction.

Up and sitting, having to sit down on meine's fav toilet bowl taking a crap...


22 friggin hours that I'm awake, and its not because of mahjong(which would have made me done so voluntarily) but because of something call WORK.


What I need now is a good shower, some nice music in the room, eye-thingy that you use in airplanes to block out the sunlight that's filtering in, warm comfy bed, and oh, my Dog Dog of cos.

And maybe before I sleep I need to think if its all worth the moolah that I'm looking at...

Jus hope I stay awake long enough to prevent something like this from happening:



Oh and I still possess no good feelings for feline creatures.

The pursuit... of what I wonder?

The pursuit of Happyness? Or happiness?

It's the same ain't it, no matter how you spell it.

Managed to catch a show today, but too bad it wasn't the show that me and Kev wanted, so we had to settle for an alternative.

No surprise what show we caught.

The show wasn't too bad, at some points I was downright inspired.

I kid you not.

"And it was at that time that I thought about Thomas Jefferson writing that Declaration of Independence. Him saying that we have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And I thought about how he knew to put the 'pursuit' in there, like no one can actually have happiness. We can only pursue it."

How true.

I've pursued what I thought would be my happiness for years but I never actually caught it, but when I had a chance at happiness in my hands, I let it slipped away, like I was too afraid to hold it, to believe that I had happiness, the capacity to be happy, and so I let go and ran away.

Or something like that...

On a lighter note, on the way back from Jase's hall I almost got into something like this:

Why?

Cos I was speeding with a white Beemer who thought he/she/it owned the road.

Speed that I hit when I passed a police van?

Somewhere in the region of 190+ km/h.

I didn't look back, I carried on speeding all the way to the exit of the expressway, and the max speed that I hit in my darling Mini?

198 km/h.

Shiok...

For everything else, there's...

Price of wallet: $200+

Cash inside wallet: $80

Unclaimed reciepts: $180+

Value of Ez-Link: $15+

Replacement value of IC: $100

Replacement value of driving license: $50

Replacement value of ATM card: $5

Losing everything in an afternoon while trying to rush for a shit job*: Not F**king Worth It.

But knowing that there're still some nice people out there: Priceless.

For everything else, there's the next job to look forward to.

*will elaborate on this story next time, some time, when I have time...

Alternative kind of gathering, won't you agree?

Played mahjong till the wee hours of around 6 in the morning today.
Though it was a different kind of setting.

The whole of today just felt very warped.
True, there were like most of us family members gathered ala CNY style.
But sadly, the occasion wasn't for CNY.

This is the kind of gathering that I dislike having to attend.
Just don't like the general atmosphere, feelings and the what-nots.
But given the unpredictability of everything and anything, who knows?

Closed one chapter,
let's move on people...

Another RECCOS annual dinner(plus other activities)...

No pictures for the RECCOS 'reunion dinner' this year.
Sorry.
Wasn't sure I could go, wasn't sure I wanted to go(given the strange twist of events unfolding about me nowadays...), plus by the time I went, it was like uber late people were already starting to leave, left, lost interest in gambling and what nots.
Hence I didn't bring my camera.
Plus I didn't know where the fiack it was at.

A great pity I had to miss the dinner this year.
Though in Ed's words, the dinner was rather chop-chop since they were more eager about gambling than anything else, which come to think of it, was no big surprise.

Lemme see the namelist for last night(ie: people that were still there when I reached)
Snake(of cos, he's the host)
Lady Boss(of cos, she's becoming a perm fixture there too)
Ed
Goose
Xw
Berd
Sw
Pegs
Beng
Phil
Yy aka Barry Eng
Yy's gal(sorry I can't remember her name)
Seng
Jase
Furby(though technically Furby should be there, since he's the house pet. But he's so cute, I've decided to adopt him as the RECCOS mascot. Any objections?)
Good seeing you guys last night.
As for those whom I missed, next time eh?

Been one heck of a weird week for me.
This CNY didn't start out too brightly for me, but I hope the rest of the year will...

Don't tell me the truth about love...

轻轻放,

我就是卸不下对你的喜欢...

V: "I hope I don't fall madly in love with someone..."

Me: "Why?"

V: "Cos if you love someone deeply and he loves you back, then its great lah. But I don't want it to be a one sided affair, the feeling's so terrible...."

Me: "Yeah, I understand..."

If loving someone and having someone love you back is priceless,

then what's loving someone and not having someone love you back?

Priceless as well?

And if its not, then why the f**k can't I let go?

Gong Xi Fa Cai!!!

A big shout out to all those reading this:

Happy Chinese New Year!
Gong Xi Fa Cai!

Er, and I don't really know what to say anymore.

Anyway, due to some unforeseen circumstances, I will not be able to go house visiting this new year. So in case I don't get to see you people during the New Year period,
Happy New Year to you all...

Scandals, TV moments, Proposals and Supper. On a V-day...

I realized my Vday every year remains the same, yet different in some ways.
Same = no gal to go out with + swinging single still very much available*
Different = things that I do vary from year to year.

One year was with the newly formed Lonely Heart's Club with the only surviving members being me and Seng. Berd joined the club later.
Ed, Goose and Ws terminated their subscription.

Another year was with Jamesy boy wandering through the streets of Orchard Road, occasionally laughing at the commericalisation of Vday and the masses that became willing consumers.
Topped the night with throwing coins at cars from the top of the Lido carpark before concluding my day staring at Jamesy's pee in a Snapple bottle.

This year's activities consisted of me waking up to a mutha-son size of a headache, getting weird phone calls in the morning when attempting to fall back into a comatose state, hitching a ride from mum to visit my grandma and collect the van, clearing up of stuff, moving stuff from the North of Stinkapore to the Southwest, twice, and suppering with 2 other lonely souls.

Many thanks to Kev and Cubsy for the invitiation, too bad Nings can't join us, and sorry to Giang for not being able to go for your supper thingy.

From west to east we went,
from night to late night we sat.
Scandals.Gossips.
Memories.
TV moments.
(future)Marriage proposals.
Supper was the catalyst,
the drinks soothed our throats and paved the way,
and the smoke created the atmosphere(or maybe not).
It's times like this that I realise how unimportant the 14th of Feb was to me, is to me, and will always be for me.
It should be a day with friends,
leave the romance for another day.A day where you can call your own,
not one tainted with the stench of commercialization and what-nots.
I may fall prey to it someday, but in the meantime,
let me have more Vdays that are special, so that I will truly learn the meaning of friendship on a day like this...

*available only when I'm not working and the gal's a babe.

Road...

I've lost the way to your heart.

Now I even lose the way to your house.

How pathetic...

And... Cut! And pack up quick!!!

The highlight for this shoot for me was probably this:
















Pitching a tent in the middle of Raffles Place... (btw, the guy in the picture is my direct boss, Daniel aka Art Director)
Yes, we pitched a tent in the middle of Raffles Place in broad daylight no less, and proceeded to tuang at the place till a grand timing of around 9 in the evening.
The only consolation was that it was a Sunday night when human traffic was at its least....

It didn't help that we had to tap power illegally from some office building (forgot which one it was though) to fire up our lights = slight pandemonium = quick shooting of the + packing up in double time.
I have never seen a bunch of people disappear so fast before. With a hell lot of equipment too.

Stared at the buildings there, which got me thinking.
Of Erbium*.
Of the initial desire to be one of the Shenton/Raffles/blah blah blah working crowd.
Of being desk bound, being a slave to the clock ticking from 9 - 5.
And then I fell asleep.
No shit.
Just like that, with the first aid kit as my pillow.
Shiok.

And now, I'm waiting for the last hurrah...

*Erbium is something that only a few people will know. If I'm not wrong, then only 1 other guy who reads this will know...

Smashing glass, Farewells and Sunburns...

For those who are interested to know what happened to me these few days, here's a short summary.

Accident.
I rammed into a lorry which rammed into a car.
Nuff said.

Saying goodbyes to actors who finished all their scenes.
Touching. When you know that they've considered you a friend, and you the same.
Memorable. When you see 1 middle aged man and a young man both trying to out do each other but in seeing who can bow the lowest and both end up lying in the middle of the road refusing to get up.
Sad. With the absence of some of them guys will mean that the set will be quieter sans their laughter, jokes and antics. Plus lesser smoking/talk cock buddies. Coupled with the fact that one of them will be flying back to Hong Kong and not knowing when he'll be back again.

Sunburns.
Bleddy hell, now I know that even hiding in a gunny sack(yesh, I had to do the gunny sack thingy again) will not help in preventing sun burns when you're already burnt.
And oh, don't ever laugh at people who're sunburnt. You will kena sooner or later.

As for the days after, let's just say I'm counting down to the end of this shoot...

In the meantime, (tiny) Tim aka Gunny Sack resident aka Timmy signing off ---

Pain sia....

Too bad I don't have the photographic evidence of my wound now.

Oh yes, lim bei is wounded again.
On the friggin lip no less.
So instead of having a stiff upper lip, I now have a SPLIT upper lip.
Reminded me of the time I had a spilt lower lip due to the stunning effort by Xw to volley into goal. With me between the posts.
This time however, was not quite ta-bah-bah-boom.
I just got hit by a flying guitar that I was supposed to catch.
Sounds easy?
Why not?
Just overlook the fact that one is squatting in a awkward position in an environment that is dimly lit(or in this case, lights were lit to create a dim ambience...), trying to catch a guitar that's quite heavy, weird shape-d, and oh... flying towards you at quite a high speed.
Result of my noob-ness: Spilt (right)upper lip* an a hell lot of blood.

Anyway, body is know quite wrecked.
Leaking nose.
Bloodshot eyes.
Split upper lip.
Cuts and scratches all over hands and legs.
Mysterious pain on the left side of the body.

Sigh....

At least we're almost done.

*For those who think this phrase is familiar, yes you're right! We've heard this kind of description before, at a certain lair that we visit, by a certain Zen master of qoutes, no?

Next stop...

It still takes around 9 minutes from Marsiling to Choa Chu Kang.

The route remains unchanged.
But what about the people taking the route?

I was on the train back home last night.
Got a knee-jerk reaction when I saw, of all people, an AJC student on same train.
The guy got off somewhere, but when the train stopped at Marsiling,
I thought I saw myself getting off too.

The boy in an all white attire, the girl in a white top and red skirt, walking in the direction of the flats, the boy trying to walk as slow as possible.
The boy in a grey blue attire, always at the head of the train, eyes eagerly focusing on the faces on the platform, then running to the carriage where she'll always alight on, feigning non-chalence but panting like a f**king dog inside, heart almost always missing a beat.

So many years ago.
We've grown up now, grown apart now.
The times and memories were eroding.
But every single f**king time I pass by the station, I re-live them all over again.

The train rumbled on.
Homewards.
It always did, and it'll always do. (for some time at least.)
The 9 minutes will go on, as it always did.
I'll have to get down after the 9 minutes, leaving pieces of me scattered on the tracks.
How many 9 minutes have I spent trapped in this limbo?
How many pieces of me are left to be scattered?

9 minutes.
Some things just remain unchanged.

But there're things that are so different now.
Let me just keep this 9 minutes of my life,
stored in some private folder,
in my mind.

I started to crank up the volume on the iPod...

Sigh...

Long day, sore throat, tons of shit job waiting for me to take care, home to a screamin mum.

Why can't real life be as simple as reel life.
Just act your part and everything will be fine.

The First and the 24th...

First day of shoot last night.
24 hours of no sleep from yesterday.

Just managed to get back home in a gruelling 1 hour plus taxi ride that involved me telling the taxi driver the destinations, concussing in the midst of trip, waking up sporadically to say bye, and eventually gave up trying to sleep due to a full bladder coupled with sub-zero wind blasting from the air con.

Guess what the first thing I did when I got home?

Made myself a bleddy cup of coffee.
Hence the ability to blog as of now.

Thinking about the days ahead of me makes me wanna cry sometimes.
Thinking about the day ahead of me makes me question the need for any sleep in the first place.
Thinking about the eventual culmination of the efforts that we all put in for the film is just the right tonic for me to carry on.

1 day down.
Many more days to go.

PS: Even though I have free days, but these free days will be spent either shopping for stuff that we didn't have time to get, doing touch ups, sending people round, etc etc. So expect me to be free only after the 11th of Feb.

PPS: Clubbing session after all this shit?

(un)Lucky 7

7th time I've been ruled offside.

Should I keep running for the damn ball?

Endless nights...

Last Thursday, I think I reached home at the ungodly time of 4 in the morning or thereabouts, which was technically Friday.
Last Friday, I think I reached home at the insane timing of 630 in the morning or thereabouts, which was technically Saturday.
Last Saturday, I think I reached home at the unbelievable timing of 6 in the morning or thereabouts, which was technically Sunday.
Last Sunday...

I think you get the picture.

These were endless nights I must say.

From a movie/supper/talk cock session with the Snake, Lady Boss and Kevin on Thursday,
to a heart to heart drinkin/gossiping session at Cubsy's house on Friday,
moving on to a class gathering interrupted by a recall to the Snake's lair for 1x good mahjong session on Saturday,
and finally, some sense of normalcy on Sunday and Monday.
Supper, coffee and talking cock.
Thus the early release today in time for this post.

Work has been hectic, as usual.
Running around, driving around, for today, painting around.
Don't be surprise to not find a blog post here for some time.
I need to work ye know... since Genting hasn't been too kind to me and the alarming rate that the monetary assets are disappearing...

Plus the slight urge to join the 4 mahjong-ing engineers for their Europe grad trip = $$$

Oh and yeah.
To all those that made these nights endless.
Thanks.
Its nights like these that keeps me going on.

PS: Eh guys, I can't play any more mahjong liao, getting quite scared of it even though I not so hardcore as you all...

PPS: Please wait for my return for 1x solid clubbing session. I TRY not to drive so can drink. More? :)

I don't wanna stop, DJ...

My ears are still ringing.
My throat hurts like hell.
My vision is still quite blurry.
My world is still spinning, sort of.
Worst of all, my whole f**king body aches.

But dang... I don't wanna stop.
Even though last night's li'l session really kept us up all night. (I reached home at the grand time of around 5-ish in the morning...)

Looks like it's gonna be my last clubbing session for some time to come.
Work is almost here.
And lucky for me the timing for my work today has been pushed back.
Hence the post at this time when I'm supposed to be somewhere in the region of Jalan Besar...

It was the same whole chink gang again.
Sort of.
The same ole people that I was bowling with during the last and first day of the years.
The bunch of people that filled up the spots at the roulette table in the heights of Genting.
The very group that played soccer(a bit insane if you ask me) the very next day we stepped home.
And also...
my clubbing kakis for last night.
I really should hang out more with other people. :)

But in any case, cheers.
The Graveyard last night was for ye all...

PS: Pegs you were right, the damn bleddy thing is STRONG.

PPS: Jase, lucky we didn't yam seng the damn thing...

PPPS: Now I remember why I can't take Graveyard...

From NYE to Genting...

Been caught up with a helluva stuff.
NYE, New Year steamboat lunch, soccer watching, packing up, Genting, soccer... the list goes on.

It's been quite a whirlwind for the past week, from the NYE bowling session:














to the Genting trip:















For more pics, you can wait while I try to upload them somewhere, somehow, sometime later.

In the meantime, time to start preparing for the work that's about to hit me...

The one about the Honky Kong-ed trip...

This will be about the trip, the one about Honky Kong-ed.
The very first post of the new year and I'm doing something that's supposed to be up last year.

Guess some things never change...

Here goes...






The inside of the lounge









The inside of the airport














The inside of the plane.














Champagne or orange juice for me?














The place of residence in Macau.

And this thing here is supposed to be a fire extinguisher???












A big-ass Xmas tree. Those 2 beside me are my bros.

Macau through a window pane. Blurry...

Our 'home' in Hong Kong.

How lucky can we get?

Don't ask me why but I happen to like this fountain.

I don't even know how to begin describing this 'burger'.

Me with Claws...

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow...












Another big-ass Xmas tree. This is really big.

Another reason why I like this particular fountain...

Back to civilisation....

Measly fireworks on Xmas eve...

Just looking at the crowd makes me wish I was at some other place...

On the way back to S'pore...









And finally...


The family photo...












Well, at least I got to take a short holiday before the new year. And before work.
Now.... for GENTING!!!!

Goodbye... and Hello!

That's it folks.
The end of a year.
Another year.

This 06 seems to pass by in a flash, maybe its me, maybe its more than me.
From schooling to slacking to finally working.
All in a span of a year.

What a year it has been, but as usual, meine reflections of this year will come...
much later I suppose.
Given the half awake state I am in now and the slow ticking of the clock that will eventually strie the tune for my departure... let's leave the heavy duty stuff for another day eh.

As of now, I'll be happily munching on my chocs, transferring files, surf, read.
And finally say goodbye to 2006.

Hello 2007...

A morbid post, if I might add...

I have no idea why I'm hammering this post out on the eve of my departure to Hong Kong.
Must be the damn vodka...

On the other hand, maybe it was the lack of effort and a hell lot of other reasons that I have yet finished the Grand Project to show to someone. 
Maybe that's why I'm hammering this out now, instead of resting for tomorrow.

Cos I have things left unsaid. 
Things left undone. 

I want so much to tell a certain person that I would love to talk to her, 
but I dunno if I can like her. 
I want so much to tell her that guess what?
I kinda like her....

Maybe it'll be pointless,
maybe it'll be useless, after all that's been said and done.
But I will never want to be in a 'what-if' situation again.
Hence, the madness in wanting the project to be completed.

We all have our fears.
Mine is that you'll never know how much I like you.

Friggin morbid/mushy post.
Think I best get some sleep.

See ye all after Xmas...