The day the Earth stood still... and I snapped....

Yes it wasn't gracious of me.
It wasn't even fair.

The spiky hair twat probably had the intelligence of a deranged monkey.

Come to think of it, it looked like a cross between an ape and a mangled doll.

It was uncalled for, surely.
For I was minding my own business, and balance of course.
I was attempting to go uphill on a pair of roller blades mind you.
And for those who bladed with yours truly, you should know that I possess the grace of a hippo and the agility of a turtle with Xmas shopping.

ie: I suck at blading.

So picture this:
Timmy boy attempting to navigate a hill while trying hard not to fall flat on his face while the missus zoomed up the treacherous path with nought a care in the world.

Funny scene?

You bet it was.

Now picture the abovementioned abomination stomping its way up the same hill with its herd, consisting of mother abomination and brother abomination.

Next, picture the missus zooming past them in a perfect pose of poise personification.
Then, picture Timmy boy lagging lubberly behind her.

This is the best part.

Imagine the scene, just imagine, the point when yours truly managed to lunge past the trio of terror, the spiky hair slimeball midget actually got the cheek to blurt out:

"Wah, so lousy. So slow and clumsy!"

The Earth stood still.
Time itself stood still, as if it was afraid to take another breath.
For in the next instance...

I managed to execute a pirouette (on blades no less!), stopped, and stared the vile, obnoxious being down. (it was quite easy actually, since that bugbear was paltry excuse of a creature)

The next words that boomed out were:

"Eh boy, you think you very good ah. You come, you come and try, and if you can do it, then you can talk to me like that."

Cost of petrol to Pasir Ris park: $2 (or thereabouts)

Cost of roller blades for an hour: $6

Cost of the look on the terrorized trio's ugly mugs: PRICELESS

At this point, the midget monstrosity was rendered speechless.
It's maternal being had the saving grace to look more than a tad embarrassed and hushed it up before herding it away from the imposing wrath of me.

Timmy boy 1 - Rude Runt 0

I rock.

Lesson learnt:

If you think you are better, please. And I beg you, PLEASE, show me that you are better, before shooting your mouth off.
Because if you are, I will be rendered speechless.
I might even compose an eulogy about your awesome-ness.
If not, I will make you speechless.
Period.

PS: The missus wasn't privy to this little incident cos she was already at the rental shop taking off her blades. I recounted the incident to her in full details and got a consolation kiss as a result.

I rock again.